Learn, Burn, Return: 4 Ways to Battle Performance Anxiety, According to a Confidence Coach

October 17, 2026 - 04:37

Worried about stumbling before a high-stakes event, like a race or a job interview? Psychologist Cindra Kamphoff offers creative strategies to overcome the jitters and build confidence in the moment.

Performance anxiety does not discriminate. It can hit an athlete before a championship game, a musician before a sold-out show, or a professional before a crucial presentation. The racing heart, the sweaty palms, and the nagging voice that whispers "you are not ready" are familiar to almost anyone who has faced a moment that mattered.

Kamphoff suggests a simple framework she calls learn, burn, and return. The first step is to learn from past performances. Instead of dwelling on what went wrong, ask what the experience taught you. That shift turns failure into information. The second step is to burn the negative self-talk. Write down the anxious thoughts, then physically destroy the paper. It sounds dramatic, but the act signals to your brain that those words do not control you. The third step is to return to the present. Use a breath, a phrase, or a physical cue to anchor yourself in the here and now.

Confidence is not the absence of fear. It is the willingness to act while fear is still in the room. These strategies do not promise a perfect performance. They offer a way to show up anyway, with your attention on what you can control and your energy pointed toward the task at hand.